MONDAY:i don't have much time, but i have an urge to write something. i just finished cooking chicken fried steak for dinner. i haven't ever made it before..tim tried it and said it was good, but i doubt if mike will like it. he is more pinicky than any 2 year old i ever raised. i also made coleslaw. i found the recipe on line for kfc coleslaw. mike loves it...so maybe he can just eat that for dinner. what a time consuming dish. i just have a small food processor, so it takes a long time to chop up all the cabbage.
i had sunday off from both jobs, i knew i would spend most of the day cleaning. during the week my cleaning usually amounts to walking through the living room and using the sleeve of my bathrobe to wipe the dust off the tv screen (which reminds me, i really need to wash my bathrobe) i did a lot of cleaning (i even washed the sheets on my bed)!!! i thought they were getting scratchy from crumbs or booboo dirts...but they were still scratchy after i washed them. silly me. it would appear i haven't shaved my legs for a long..long..long..time. hence the itchy pokeys on my legs at night. i also picked up the leaves that have been on my lawn alll winter. now i have some very big bare spots. every year i throw out grass seed in the vain hope of growing a lush green lawn, and every year it fails. for the last two years i have even hauled pickup loads of fresh topsoil, but nothing seems to work. emily even talked me into buying that miracle grass on tv that will even sprout on your sidewalk. i didn't see it sprout in the lawn or the sidewalk or anywhere else i dropped it. but the other day i was watching tv and i saw this thing you can buy for your house or apartment for your dogs to go potty on. it's called THE POTTY PATCH. it's $40 for a 17"x27" patch. i figure my lawn to be roughly 45'x 15'. so for about $8,000.00 i could do the whole thing in potty patches. (this was sort of one of the "how many times does santa go around the christmas tree" problems). of course that $8,000 isn't counting shipping and handling.
today i was also going to blog about the great red vine fast i have going. i went almost 5 days without eating any, then mike went and bought a big tub of them last friday. of course, i have no will power, so i have been eating them by the handfuls. at least this time i put the tub in the kitchen and not on my desk, so i have to get up off my big ass if i really want to get one (or 2 or 3 or 4). might as well make it worth the walk in there.
i finished reading cold comfort farm. it was really a good book. it actually made me laugh. it was written in the 1930"s, and for being so old, it was a very entertaining book. now i am reading the heart shaped box. a spooky story written by joe hill (whom i have discovered is actually stephen kings son). it is not scary to me, but it is keeping me interested. definately a good book.
speaking of reading...sometimes i get these catalogs in the mail that i swear are printed for old people. they have things like "shoedini"..so you can get your shoes on without bending over. and lots of styles of velcro shoes (ugh) and a thing called the gopher grabber to pick things up off the floor (again without bending over) or get things from high shelves. but the other day i actually flipped through the whole catalog...WOWZA!!! i don't know what them old people are up to, but further back there are several pages of (close your eyes you innocents) vibrators and other sexual stimuli. ok, i have been married 4 times, so i ain't no virgin, and i have seen a lot of things....but, holy crap! when did a vibrator go from just being a plastic battery operated penis replacement to being something that looks like darth vadar could have sliced and diced obi wan kenobi with? does this thing actually run on 20 D cell batteries or is it diesel powered? and for an even deeper question. should a mom actually have anything hidden in her draw that her kids (or grandkids) could take outside and wave at the neighbor kids? (like a red rider bb gun..it could probably put an eye out). and then the designer, on top of everything else kinky about it, says "and lets make it bright purple so no one will confuse it with a flashlight or a gun in the drawer". some dark and stormy night a ne'er do well thug breaks into your home and instead of grabbing your p226 sig sauer 9mm, you pull out your neon purple Rabbit vibrator and start waving it at him. life is just so ridiculous sometimes.
WEDNESDAY:now it is 2 days later...and here again i only have a small amount of time. i have to take emily to a job interview at winco on my way to work. she is applying to be a cart kid. then i have to leave work to take her back home. i really would like to see her get the job, but she also needs to finish her GED. and now i worry about tim. how will he feel when she moves on to a job and he is still just sitting here playing video games because he won't talk? sharyl (from work) was telling me that her moms neighbor has her 42 year old son living at home with them, and he doesn't talk to anyone and collects ssi payments. i truly want more than that for tim. i worry that one morning he will wake up and be very depressed about life passing him by because he won't talk. i had thought he could try for the cart kid job, even without talking, but mike said he doesn't think he would be able to do it because of his knees. another thing for tim to be bummed about. no one else seems to understand how much this worries me. mike always makes a joke about it when i say anything. but i realize that if anything happens to me, tim has no one to talk to except emily, and she is moving on and growing up. mike has been here for 3 years and tim doesn't talk to him. he doesn't talk to ben (my oldest son) since he moved out years ago, he has grown up here with my parents next door since he was about 5 and he never has spoken to them. now that he is out of school he is even more isolated from the world. as i have mentioned before, he is my biggest worry in life. i just don't know what to do for him.
NOW IT IS THURSDAY MORNING..i will finish this some day to post. i made chicken enchiladas for dinner yesterday. they are really good. i am taking a half of one for my dinner tonight. remember a while back when i mentioned our night crew was down to 8 people? well, this week it is down to 4 (plus our supervisor..but she can't do much since she is still recovering from her tummy tuck). 2 of the mixers are awol. one might have another job and one has a sore neck. both have been gone since last tuesday. and our other machine operator took this week off. that leaves me to do ovens and run the machines. needless to say, upper management still seems to expect the same production even with half the crew. i have come to the conclusion that upper management are all assholes. i have always suspected as much...but now i am sure. our manager is phillipe. he is french, has a heavy french accent and one eye that looks off in some other direction all the time (it makes a person always want to look over their shoulder when he is talking to them, to see who is standing behind you). i never thought i could speak french, but now i know one word...phillipe is french for asswipe. that's pretty harsh, isn't it? but after working here for almost 24 years i just call them as i sees them (with both eyes pointing the same way).
FRIDAY 2A.M. i just got home from work and i am determined to finish this. i have to be at winco at 10 a.m. (shit...that's only 8 hours away). 10-4 today and 11-5 sat. then i get sunday off, but we all know how a day off gets spent here. recleaning. i once read a quote that insanity is doing the same thing over and over, but expecting a different result each time. so why do i keep cleaning...am i insane? i spend a whole day off cleaning and think that by my next day off the house will still be clean and i can work outside. i'm not insane, i'm nucking futs! but sunday the weather is supposed to still be sunny and warm, so i would like to mow my lawn before some rabid herd of cows wanders by and sees it as fine grazing pasture. first i will need to get my mower back from ben, it has been over at his house since last summer. did i mention that melinda (his girlfriend of 7 years) finally moved out, forever? i am very happy about that. she used to be so nice, but she has totally gone nuts. rumor has it from some of their mutual friends that she is doing some very heavy drugs. actually she moved out over a year ago, but they were still "trying to work it out". she was always complaing to ben about her life going no where and being depressed, but all she would do was sit on the couch, watch tv and sleep. then when they went to counceling, of course everything was bens fault, and anytime the counselor remarked on her behavior she would get pissed. then, there was the several times she cheated on him. he told me she got mad when he insisted on wearing a concom for sex, but he said he wasn't sure who or how many guys she had slept with. this time i just hope she stays gone.
well, guess that is about all my ponderings for now. winco awaits me in a few hours, so i really should go to bed. i just have one more thing to mention. one of my particular pet peeves is this...homeless people with a dog!!! nothing irritates me quite as much as seeing some idiot, who for whatever reason is standing by the side of the road with his "GOD BLESS..anything will help"..or "stranded..need gas money" sign, and sitting next to him is a dog. it just pisses me off that some bum who can't even take care of himself has a pet. what kind of life is that for a dog? walking down the road and inhaling exhaust fumes all day (because we don't all drive runaway priuses). but the other day i saw a most peculiar sight going to work. this guy is hitching down the freeway with a big old backpack on and he has a dog on a leash walking next to him...the unusual part is that this dog was a chihuahua. a little teeny tiny rat-looking chihauhau. and do you know what i found myself wondering? i weondered how far they had been walking..and did that little teeny tiny chihauhau actually start out as a great dane and has just had his legs walked down to the nubbins.
April 21, 2017 The Way Home
4 weeks ago